Saturday, June 11, 2011

"her beating heart became a boom"

My excitement, my aliveness is struggling to stay contained inside me, co-existing with the tight grasp and boundaries of the eating disorder. 

I have not faced the internal conflict within, I am five pounds away from 95 pounds, and I still need to finish packing. But I am more ready than ever.

I have spent much of my time hiding, running from my issues, but now I am ready to be reckless, to be strong, to do what my heart, mind, body craves.

I am ready to live.

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I am leaving early in the morning tomorrow. I will not be able to get to a laptop for about three weeks (except maybe once or twice), but I've pre-written and scheduled some posts to be posted, since I can't stand the thought that this blog wouldn't be updated for three weeks. But unfortunately, I won't be able to do comment replies, or comment on any of your blogs. I will miss all of you more than you can imagine, and I hope that each one of you stays safe and happy.

Not everyone has posted their final competition weigh-in, so I will be unable to announce the winner and give out the prize until I return, and I am incredibly sorry for that.
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24 comments:

  1. AnonymousJune 11, 2011 at 5:44 PM

    I hope you have heaps of fun!

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  2. kesJune 11, 2011 at 6:23 PM

    Have fun! Stay strong. :)

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  3. AnonymousJune 11, 2011 at 6:47 PM

    have fun! we'll miss you too! xx

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  4. parisienne.loveJune 11, 2011 at 7:27 PM

    Have a great time! Good job with the weight loss!

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  5. Sam LupinJune 11, 2011 at 7:43 PM

    :) That beginning post made me so happy. You sound so enthusiastic about this trip that the pain of not having you constantly cajole us for 3 weeks lessens dramatically.
    We'll miss you lots! xx your posts are always so inspiring.
    Love you so much darling! And 5 pounds is nothing! ;)
    Oh. Gives us more time to lose more weight and cheat ;P I think that's a good idea either way. I've lost one pound in total if you're not counting me just grasping the concept "NO BINGE".

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  6. Alex AccursedJune 11, 2011 at 8:07 PM

    =) Have fun.
    Also, the beginning made me want to change songs to some really quick and just DANCE. Hahh

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  7. MarieJune 11, 2011 at 8:32 PM

    have fun and enjoy yourself :)

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  8. AlexJune 11, 2011 at 9:22 PM

    Have fun! :D

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  9. Rowan June 11, 2011 at 10:06 PM

    Safe travels, and of course, have a fantastic trip!

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  10. AnonymousJune 11, 2011 at 11:17 PM

    Have a great time!

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  11. AnonymousJune 12, 2011 at 1:10 AM

    Have a brilliant time hon, you will be missed! I am going away today for a week also!

    Be strong and be happy xx

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  12. AnonymousJune 12, 2011 at 1:58 AM

    Have a great time!
    Lottie x

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  13. CJune 12, 2011 at 2:53 AM

    I hope you have a great time ♥

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  14. -elleJune 12, 2011 at 4:48 AM

    have a lovely time!
    xxx

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  15. Princess PerfectionJune 12, 2011 at 8:06 AM

    Have a wonderful time!
    I will certainly miss you, but look forward to seeing what posts you have in store for us in your absence. :)
    Much love and strength always. <3

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  16. JéanneJune 12, 2011 at 8:40 AM

    What a truly fucking awesome post, Babe! I'm so proud of you! You can do it! I believe in you 100%!

    Never apologise for long comments, I love hearing from you. Thanks for all your support and for offering to 'fix' the system so you could be my 100th follower, I really appreciate it! I hope you have a wonderful time and have heaps of fun! Please travel safely and return in one piece.

    All my love. <3. XXX.

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  17. displayedJune 12, 2011 at 9:06 AM

    Boom it up baby!!! Let your heart soar, free from ed! Live it, love it, own it! So happy for you. Break free, make your own story. Be safe and well my dearie

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  18. Sierra HastingsJune 12, 2011 at 10:15 AM

    Have fun!

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  19. Hilly.MJune 12, 2011 at 10:22 AM

    Try to relax and not think too much of this blog...it's time for your life. However, I for one will miss it.
    Enjoy life!

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  20. Kat not JasJune 12, 2011 at 4:35 PM

    Have an awesome time!!! :)

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  21. *GRRRL*June 13, 2011 at 12:28 AM

    so, iam not sure how this all works yet, kind of a newb :/ i made an account JUST TO FOLLOW this blog haha. i love what your doing here truly. i just made a blog as well if anyone wants to check it out id love to talk to someone. my goal weight is 95, iam 102 right now, BMI of 17.33% iam sort of worried about my diet though because iam hypoglycemic, vegan AND trying to go "thin." so if anyone has any suggustions as to how to stay healthy during all of this id appreciate the input! thanks so much. looking forward to hearing from you guys! :D

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  22. AnonymousJune 13, 2011 at 2:50 AM

    See you soon! We will miss you, looking forward to your return already! Have a fab time sweetie x

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  23. JaxJune 13, 2011 at 12:24 PM

    have fun have fun have fun!! much love goes with you <3

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  24. DaniJune 14, 2011 at 2:12 PM

    have a great time hunny enjoy urself

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