"You never come all the way out of the mirror; you stand, for the rest of your life, with one foot in this world and one in another, where everything is upside down and backward and sad."
-Marya Hornbacher, Wasted
My copy of her memoir is like origami, a thousand little folds in the top corners of pages, marking profound ideas and phrases I wanted to remember. Reading the words over and over, it creates a strange sort of emptiness inside, full but still starving, as if I've tried to satisfy my hunger with freezing ice water. She tells her story so well and so completely, it feels like I've lived her life and experienced the horrors. Her world seemed confused and dark, the images unfocused, as she ripped and tore away the realness of being human with wants and needs; becoming sharp ribs and bones holding up a nearly dead body like the framework of a damaged house. And it's terrifying and fascinating to see how far she went, 52 pounds at 5'3, almost inspiring to know it is possible to lose half of myself and still come out alive, though partially dead.
There is no truly happy ending to her story, and there will never be a happy ending to anorexia or bulimia, and we know that, and we probably knew before we slipped into the mirror, but it'll take all our strength to break our way out.
Little Miss Thin- Thank you, you are so sweet!
jackie- I've missed you bunches, I'm glad you are back! That made my day, I'm sure we'll both be able to wear them soon. (: I hope you have a lovely day!
Kat- Thank you for your kind words and positivity! I hope you have an amazing day.
Dirk Gently- Thank you, you're so nice!
Ellaveigh- I agree, tomorrow can always be better. Thank you for commenting!
More Than Me- Thank you, I hope you have a lovely day!
Lucy's Shadow- Thank you so much!
amelia- I hope you're having a lovely day also. Thank you!
Princess Perfection- Your comments always make me smile so hard. Thank you for being you! (:
time to pretend- Thank you incredibly, you made my day. I am doing better now, thanks to all of the lovely support from amazing people like you. <3
S.- Thank you so much for your comment! (:
becca;- "Hope is always there, sometimes we're just looking in the wrong places," so true. Thank you!
A Girl with Tiny Intentions- Thank you, I hope you have a lovely day! (:
Camille- It sounds like a really great job! I will definitely look into it. Thank you, I hope you have an amazing day!
EWC- I'm very glad you're back, we've missed you!
Dani- Thank you, I hope that everything is going well for you.