June 7th, 2011? My calendar still says October 2010. Months have passed, much too fast, much too slow.
It's summer, almost 100 degrees outside. I'm still hibernating, buried in the snow, hiding from the world. Living is exhausting, I'm consumed by my eating disorder. I loved people, I truly did, now I only want to be with those that are closest to me. Plans for the movies, bowling, the mall, and especially restaurants are avoided, party invitations are ignored. Texts, facebook messages, and calls go unanswered. Laughing is an effort, conversations seem meaningless. I am frozen in the snow.
Starting this Friday, I'll have to wake up when all I want is to sleep. Swimming with friends, followed shortly by three weeks with J, and then traveling out of the country for two weeks, ending with the beach with friends. I'm not ready at all, but this is for the best, I need to be alive again.
jackie- I agree, it does seem like we have a more difficult time following the golden law in reverse. Thank you for your comment, you made my day much better, and I hope you also have a lovely day! <3
ElBar7a- "I will think of every breath I take as something and I will remember that I am worthy." your words inspired me! I am truly glad for your confidence and love for yourself today, I hope that you will continue to feel this way! (:
Alex Accursed- I'm very happy for your positive attitude for yourself, you deserve to feel this happiness. Good luck, stay beautiful!
Hilly.M- Happiness is quite elusive sometimes. Thank you, I hope that you have a wonderful day! (:
Skinny Little Me- I'm really sorry to hear that you've written that list of things you hate about yourself. Go outside, look at the stars, that's how many beautiful qualities you possess. I hope you have a lovely day full of happiness, you deserve it!
Cinnamon Brown- I love your positive attitude and your way of thought, that we always have a choice. Choice is important to me, because control is important to me, yet I seem to forget frequently that I have a choice. Thank you for commenting!
Wings to Set me Free- I've never thought of it that way ("whenever I meet a critical person, I always feel bad for them, because I know how much more critical they must be of themselves") , thank you for the insight! Have an amazing day!
~christy~- You are beautiful, always remember that. I hope you have a very wonderful day, you deserve it!
Lucy's Shadow- Good luck on your fasting! I'm glad you're back, I've missed you! I hope you have a lovely day, you deserve it. (:
MiniandMerry- I agree, learning to love yourself is one of the most difficult challenges we face in life. You're right, true beauty is from the inside, I hope we all see that one day.
Alex- Thank you, I hope you have a lovely day! <3
Gianni- We definitely are, we attack ourselves from within.
Ivy- Thank you for your comment! Yup, I also hope we are kinder to ourselves!
Bones- I agree, I do the same, I hope that we start treating ourselves like we treat others!
Thin or Not- You made my day, I hope you have a lovely day as well. <3
lulu- I'm sorry that your list of things you hate about yourself is longer than the list of likes about yourself. But the beautiful, amazing qualities about you greatly outnumber your perceived faults, and I hope you see that. (:
Marie- Thank you, that made me smile!