Restriction. Obsessive calorie counting. Exercising until the point of exhaustion and collapse. Starving for days. Lying. Throwing food away. Why do we do all this? For me, it's for much more than looking hot in a bikini (though that is a motivator!), it's more than wearing Size 00, more than getting envious stares, more than having hipbones and ribs. Yes, those are all a huge part of my reasons, but it goes deeper than that.
It's about finding myself, underneath this body that isn't mine, that doesn't seem to belong to me yet, but will be mine. It's about having the precise, exact self-control of a machine. For the sharpness of mind and senses that comes with hunger. It's about making myself disappear, destroying the parts of me that I no longer want, not just the physical parts, but the parts of me rooted deep in my mind. It's about attaining perfection, both in mind and body.
I've already posted this picture, but it's so gorgeous, it deserves being in two posts.
What's your reason?
Comment Replies: Thank you so much for taking the time to comment! I love all of your comments and truly appreciate every single one!
Alex- Swimsuits make me uncomfortable too! I used to be completely un self-conscious in one, as a kid. I'm sure you'll look absolutely amazing in one this summer! Thank you for your comment! :)
Neeska- Victoria's Secret is a great store! You should definitely buy that bikini. We're both going to turn heads at the beach this summer! :) Thanks for commenting!
Nichole S.- Your determination is motivating! It'll definitely pay off. :) Thank you so much for your comment!
Vasilikie- I live for summer weather! Soon, hopefully, I'll live for wearing a bikini. :) Thanks for your comment! Good luck on your goals!
It was my sister's birthday, so I had to eat cake today. I estimate around 400 calories. :( Luckily, there's no more birthdays coming up soon, so no more cake! Oh crap, except this weekend, when I'll have to eat cake again for her birthday party. I'll play tons of tennis, which burns 500 calories for 2 hours.
Thank you for following my blog! :) Every one of you helps me stay on track! I hope you all hve an amazing day!